Death on the Stairs
by turkatron2000
Summary: Murdoc x OC, set in phase 2. The gang hires a maid. Misunderstandings abound.
1. Chapter 1, The first chapter

Well, I wrote this story a while ago but deleted it. I rewrote it now bc I'm bored. I suppose a quick few notes before I forget.

1\. I have a thing about writing accents, so I just don't do it. If someone can tell me how to do it i'd appreciate it but I don't mess with it. An american writing/mimicking an english accent always makes me cringe. So i don't so it.

2\. I haven't kept up with the gorillaz, so this is based on what little i can remember from when i did. That's also why it's set in phase 2, because that's when I last kept track of them. I've been drinking since, so i can't remember it all too accurately.

3\. That being said, this is probably going to be OOC as hell, so please read it with a grain of salt. or attack me mercilessly, i suppose it's the same thing.

4\. There will be cursing, I don't know about graphic sex scenes though. I think it's a bit awkward to write them (and I definitely can) and at the end of the day, this isn't 50 shades of grey. While this story is rated M, it's not meant to satisfy my lack of a sex life (because it's inherently untrue) so sorry. Ya'll can fic it out if you want, i really don't care.

Well, now that I said all i wanted to say, I guess there's nothing left but to say that I hope it at least has an interesting plot and OC (sorry). I read stories here all the time so I hope this gets read as well. Also, let me know what you think.

Thanks,

The author.

P.S. - Gorillaz are not mine. I am most certainly not gaining anything from writing this.

* * *

Kong Studios was a mess. There was no way around this fact. The messy hallways and dirty rooms were winning the war that Russell had declared and championed. He'd been sick of the mess since the first day he found himself in that mansion but hadn't had the time to focus his energy into fixing it. And now, it seemed, it had come back to bite him in the ass.

The band meetings and passive aggressive notes he would leave around proved to be ineffective. Murdoc was never there, 2D was usually too pilled-out to function and Noodle, well she tried her best to help Russell but her educational pursuits trumped her efforts, which he understood completely. Russell knew there was much to be done but it became clear that he would need help, specifically someone that could do it for him when he wasn't available. It would soon become clear that hiring a maid would be the only way that the mansion would become habitable once again.

True, it wasn't the ideal situation. He knew that Murdoc would have a fit, especially since he tended to like his privacy. Ironic for a man who didn't think twice about showing his junk to perfect strangers while on tour. 2D wouldn't care either way, and would probably confuse himself once he encountered the actual maid. Noodle would probably be the only one to agree and respect his decision wholeheartedly.

So the day came when he announced his decision during a band meeting. As predicted, Murdoc went on a tirade in which he rebuked his decision and assured him that it would not happen. 2D mildly agreed with both parties and Noodle thought it was a great idea. The vote was 3 - 1 in favor of the maid in the end and Russell got his way. Murdoc disappeared for a few days after that, which worked out for Russell as he had potential candidates for the job over. Russell felt it wouldn't be fair to surprise them with the devastation they would be hired to fix.

In total, he had at least 20 people come in for an interview, the ones left after weeding out would-be paparazzi aides or fans wanting a glimpse into their home life. One of those 20 candidates, the one Russell would go on to hire, seemed to view the mansion as some sort of project and met it with genuine enthusiasm and professionalism.

"I'll be honest with you Mr. Hobbs, this place is very badly kept. You'd probably be better off razing it and starting fresh after having the land blessed," she said to him, sitting across from him at the kitchen table. She took a sip from her waterbottle and looked around at the kitchen, as though choosing her words carefully. "Don't get me wrong sir, I love this place, but I want you to understand that if i'm willing to live here and work for you it's because this house is the ONLY thing i am going to dedicate my time to. I'm not running errands for your friends, I'm not anyone's chauffeur and I definitely will not be getting tangled up in whatever stuff you guys are doing with your lives."

It was those exact words that made up Russell's mind. The other interviews that followed this one were met with impatience as he only did them as a formality. When he was finally done, he called the woman back. The phone rang a few times and she picked up.

"Hello? Who is this?"

"Hello Ms. Teresa Montoya, it's me Russell, how are you doing?"

"I'm great Mr. Hobbs, how are you?"

"I'm good, thank you. I was calling in regards to your interview and to offer you the position."

"I am definitely interested Mr. Hobbs."

"Call me Russel, no need to be formal... after all, you've met most of us, I think it's alright to keep it casual."

"Ok Mr... I mean, Russel, I am definitely interested in the position!"

"Great! I'll have you come in tomorrow and fill in the paperwork and we can arrange for your things to be brought in," he answered.

Russell knew that Murdoc was not present to scare anyone off but would be back soon with a promise to oppose and reject any and all candidates for the job. Russell knew this and so decided that he would move in Teresa as soon as possible and Murdoc would simply have to get used to her. Besides, he thought, she was an attractive woman and Murdoc would probably want to keep her around once he saw her.

"Well then, that sounds good," Teresa replied, "I suppose then that i'll see you tomorrow."

"Fantastic! On behalf of all of us here at Kong Studios, allow me to welcome you onto our team!"

"Thank you! I look forward to it!"

"You're welcome, I'll see you tomorrow, goodbye!"

"'Bye!"

click.

Russell sighed contentedly to himself, excited at the prospect of the new beginning. A clean house. Finally.


	2. Chapter 2, Moving in

Morning came and there was a rush of excitement about the house. Noodle and 2D had been informed the previous evening of the new maid that would be living with them. Noodle wondered if she was to be trusted but was otherwise happy that they'd finally have a clean house. 2D wondered if she would be anal and oppressive but was still ambivalent about the situation. Both wondered how the argument between Murdoc and Russell would go down.

"Maybe he won't care," 2D mused, "especially since she's sort of attractive."

"You think?" Noodle asked, "she seemed a bit too jumpy, maybe she's hiding something, i don't think Murdoc will like that."

"Nah, he's pretty shallow, I once saw him try to pick up a girl who'd thrown up on herself," 2D mentioned, "the jumpiness won't matter."

"Well, whatever happens, I hope she can clean this mansion up," Noodle replied.

Russell had taken that morning to go into town to meet with Teresa and get all the paperwork signed. Everything went without a hitch, especially since Teresa had her belongings pre-packed and in storage.

...

Teresa had finally arrived to the mansion and was once again welcomed by her new employers. She had been informed about Murdoc, who would not arrive until later. Teresa didn't care much about this detail though felt there was something sketchy about the way in which it was delivered. She suspected there would be an issue but as she was already hired, she figured it'd be a mess to try and get rid of her due to the contract she signed and didn't worry about it too much. She was just happy that she was finally getting back on her feet after a year that tested her will and her patience. Russell allowed her to pick a room which she would occupy for the duration of her time there and she picked one on the side of the house opposite the band's living quarters.

"Are you sure this is the room you want?" Russell asked Teresa, who was already inspecting the room.

"Yeah, this looks a good size," she replied, pressing down on the bed's mattress. She looked around at the plain room. It was only the bed and a dresser in it but she didn't mind the blank quality of it. It was what she needed, she thought.

Russell looked down the hallway somewhat nervously and took a deep breath before deciding to warn the new maid.

"Well, the thing is that Murdoc likes to stay in the room down the hallway sometimes and... well it's ..." Russell struggled to find the words to express his concern. He didn't intend to rub Teresa's employment in Murdoc's face and he also understood that Murdoc's lifestyle would perhaps cause the new maid discomfort.

"What, is he like, not cool with this or something?" Teresa asked, and then realised that there was another man at the doorway who was looking at her shrewdly.

"Oh, are you Murdoc then?" she asked, and Russel turned around in time to see Murdoc fuming.

"What the fuck is this Russell? Didn't I tell you i didn't want a fucking maid?" Murdoc asked sharply, turning to Russell. Russell seemed unfazed at this and turned to Teresa.

"I'm sorry, I'll be right back Teresa," he apologized and then turned his attention back to Murdoc, "Do you mind if we step over here for this?"

Russell stepped down the hallway with Murdoc fuming in tow. Teresa didn't know what to do except sit on her new bed and wait. She took out her cellphone to play solitaire, there was no need to worry over anything as far as she was concerned. It had been a shitty year, there was no way things could get any worse.

"Why the fuck did you hire her?" Murdoc asked as soon as the two finished their short trek down the hallway. "I told you i didn't want a fucking maid and you move her into MY side of the house."

"Well, she picked this room, I was about to explain that you didn't really want her on this side of the house but then you showed up," Russell explained in a matter-of-fact way.

"Why the fuck is she even here? We are perfectly fine without a fucking bitch who'll be in our fucking business."

"Well Murdoc, I don't give a shit anymore," Russell said calmly, shrugging and walked back to the room. He knew Murdoc wasn't going to fight him over this, that this hissy fit was all a show to disguise the fact that he'd probably try to sleep with Teresa later. When he got to the room he saw that Teresa was playing with her cellphone, predictably Murdoc had followed him with the same grimace still firmly on his face.

"So should I move my stuff then or what?" Teresa asked, putting down her phone.

Russell shook his head and replied "Nah, you can stay in this room... if Murdoc here gives you a hard time, just let me know, i'll correct him."

"Are you sure? I mean, no offense Murdoc..."

"It's Mr. Niccalls to you..."

"Err, Mr. Niccalls... if i need to move, then it's no problem, I'll do it. I didn't mean to piss you off... err, i mean wind you up i guess they say here, right?" Teresa said, trying to placate the angered man who stood before her.

"No Teresa, that won't be necessary, Murdoc will just have to manage this one time," Russell assured her, earning a death glare from Murdoc.

"Do I get any say in this or is this not my fucking band anymore?" Murdoc asked sardonically.

"Well, there's your Winnebago parked out there if you REALLY can't stand to live in the same house as the rest of us and the maid..." Russell said, matching Murdoc's sardonic tone.

There was a moment's silence in which the three simply looked at each other as though they didn't know what to make of the situation. Russell looked at his watch and realized that the movers would be arriving soon.

"The movers will be here soon, I'll be heading downstairs to let them know where to bring your stuff."

"Ok," Teresa responded simply, looking at both of them. Russell nodded his head at her and walked out of the room. Murdoc looked after Russell and seemed to linger at her doorstep.

He'd been waiting for Russell to be out of an earshot.

"Listen you bitch, don't think you're staying here long, Russell may have hired you but I'll find a way to make you leave," he threatened as he inched closer to her face.

Teresa smiled nervously and chuckled "Ok then, whatever."

The reaction only served to anger Murdoc further, who left the room and slammed the door behind him.

Teresa sighed and decided that there would be no use in aggravating this man who clearly had some sort of emotional disturbance of some kind. She really didn't care in the end, as far as she was concerned, she wasn't there to make friends. The fact that her life had become a reality show was disturbing but there was little that she could do about that now. She understood that there could not be any personal entanglements if this was to become a stable job and living situation. She would eventually perhaps try to reason with Murdoc but for now, she would be completely professional. Russell had told her that the majority of her projects would be self-directed but that every once in a while there could be special requests from any member. She immediately wondered who would be the one to abuse the special requests clause of her contract.


	3. Chapter 3, Passive Aggression

It turned out, sure enough, that that person who would overwork Teresa was Murdoc. Teresa had known she had been on his bad side since day one. In the 3 weeks she'd been there, he'd managed to spill acrylic paint, maple syrup, what she assumed was urine and various other fluids onto the carpet in the common areas. At first Teresa tried to be attentive and quick about cleaning the messes when he called her over but eventually, she started leaving it until she could get to it. She noticed the less attention she paid to Murdoc, the less he would try to mess with her. Teresa was thinking this as she scraped the gum off of the underside of a coffee table when she heard the familiar raspy voice of her least favorite housemate.

"Teresa, there's a pile of shit in the lobby, pick it up..." Murdoc called as he walked towards her.

Since she was on her back on the floor, she got to see his Cuban-heeled boot stop inches from her face. She rolled her eyes, confident that he couldn't see her through the wooden coffee table top. She shimmied out from under the table and propped herself onto her feet.

"Alright sir, what am I dealing with?" she asked politely but tersely.

"A pile of shit, moron, need i spell it out for you?" Murdoc snapped.

"Ok then, Mr. Niccals, I'll get to it as soon as I can." She answered, not making eye contact. She knew she would get angry if she did.

"Well, you bloody well better, you're almost as useless as face-ache over there..." he said contemptuously, gesturing at 2D who was asleep on the couch.

Teresa said nothing and pretended to look at him in the eye though in reality she was imagining stabbing Murdoc's face with the the screwdriver she held in her hand.

"I don't know why we fucking pay you..." me muttered as he turned to leave.

Teresa looked on as Murdoc walked away and out of the room.

"And I don't know why anyone sucks your cauliflower dick... oops, did i say that out loud?" Teresa said to herself, chuckling stupidly at her own quip. 2D laughed faintly behind her. He saw that despite her chuckling, there were tears welling up in her eyes.

"Heh, you liked that one, didn't you?" she asked 2D with a chuckle. She blinked hard and wiped her face with the back of her hand.

"He's such a wanker," 2D said, sitting up, "Don't mind him, he's still upset that Russell hired you."

"I know you're probably right but he's such a cunt," Teresa said as she took back her gum-scraping position. There was no longer a danger of crying anymore, 2D's words seemed to assure her that she wasn't completely alone.

"Hang in there Teresa, he'll get over it..." 2D said, trying to console Teresa. In the short time she'd been there, 2D had grown fond of her for the mere fact that the house was noticeably becoming more and more habitable. They'd had lots of small talk but he'd never really seen her upset until then.

"You doing anything later? Maybe you can come along with me to catch a show, get your mind off of it." 2D suggested.

"Will Russell be okay with it?" Teresa asked, peeking out from under the coffee table.

"He'll be fine with it i think, Russell is pretty easy going, i think he'll understand if i tell him what's going on."

"Well then I'd love to hang out later, I'll finally get out of this hell-hole... no offense."

"None taken, what with there being one in the basement and all..."

"Oh yeaaaaah..."


	4. Chapter 4, Should've Texted

Murdoc had casually entered the bathroom and noticed for the first time that the lights seemed brighter and the stale stench of urine was absent. Then he looked towards the last stall and saw that Teresa was in there, her back to the open stall door. He rolled his eyes and was about to leave but found himself struck with a sudden train of thought.

It had been months since Teresa was hired. Murdoc was annoyed that Teresa didn't seem to show any type of emotion and thought she was very boring. It was fun to make extra messes for her to clean at first but since she didn't react to it, it became tedious. He was struggling to find things to fuck up and had to come up with newer, bigger messes. That in itself became a chore.

It was then that he decided, on impulse, that it'd be pretty funny to startle her so he closed the door softly behind him. He tiptoed to the nearest stall and quietly put his feet up on the toilet as he silently stood there and waited. And then he noticed that she was scrubbing and talking at the same time...

"He's whatever, I tried working things out with him but it's not going anywhere..." Teresa said somewhat disinterestedly. Her scrubbing slowed down as though she was pausing to think.

"I mean, I went to see him when he called me but then he just rubbed the fact that he cheated on me in my face and then acted like he wasn't trying to," she continued, sounding mildly irritated. Murdoc was intrigued, he continued to listen.

"I just know, ok? If he was trying to fix things, then he'd just apologize without all the gory details and talk about how to fix it. I think he's trying to wind me up, he probably gets off on it."

The scrubbing started again with Teresa occasionally "aha-ing" and "okay-ing".

"See, I'm not that desperate to be with anyone, okay? Hell no, I'm giving up relationships here not getting laid..."

'I hadn't seen that coming,' he thought to himself, smirking silently. While the few times he'd seen Teresa around were brief, he always thought she looked so unassuming and young, and it annoyed him. She dressed so plainly and unflattering that she seemed to melt into the background. As far as he knew, she didn't really have a personality so the conversation he was hearing was getting more and more interesting.

"I would feel way too inadequate, ha ha... nah, nah, i don't think they care. I mean I mostly talk to Russell and Noodle, but 2D doesn't give me that vibe and the other one won't even look at me... I mean like, he doesn't seem interested, we kinda had a moment a while ago... Well, no, not all the way, it was just super awkward... it really was nothing, like i said, didn't go all the way or anything... I mean he's a sweet guy and I hang out with him every once in a while but it's awkward since I work here... I think we make good friends but not much else... Nah, he's not the type, believe me, i tried... Oh him? no, like i said, he won't talk to me unless it's to talk shit to me and he, like, has something against me because I came to work for them... Yeah, he's hardly here and when he is he's got some bimbo in tow... I really don't care that much, just as long as he stays out of my business hence why i would never try to talk to him like that... I mean I'm sure as a person he's cool or whatever but, like, we are not on those terms... I know, I think this is the first time I've felt like this, i'm not used to being completely ignored... hah hah hah i sound so conceited... i'd offer him the blowjob if i knew it'd change his mind about me..."

One of Murdoc's feet had abruptly slipped into the toilet and made a splash as he was sort of thrown aback at the last thing she had said. Teresa had apparently been unable to hear it through the large peals of laughter she and her friend were producing. He was beginning to feel impatient and wanted desperately to know what it was she was talking about. Just then, his phone received a text message and sounded an alert in his back pocket. There was an abrupt silence.

"SHIT, I think there's someone in here... fuck, look I gotta go..." Teresa said in barely a whisper. Murdoc heard something drop into the toilet with a light splash and a rustling, which he assumed was Teresa putting away the phone. He quickly hopped off the toilet and flushed it. He walked out just in time to see Teresa looking wide-eyed in his direction.

"How long have you been here?" Teresa asked, staring intently at Murdoc. This was the most emotion he had ever seen her convey and it was fantastic.

"So 2D, eh?" Murdoc asked with a smirk. Teresa went red and her jaw slacked open for a moment while she seemingly tried to choose her words carefully.

"Hmm?" she simply replied.

"You were talking about 2D on the phone..."

"No I wasn't..." Teresa said, making her best denial face.

"You know, I COULD tell Russell about this..." Murdoc said, smirk still intact. Teresa's face scrunched up in horror as she looked to Murdoc. He noticed that she had begun to pick violently at her left index finger's cuticle.

"Well then, tell him I guess..." she answered after a moment of tense silence. The calm returned to her face, she knew she'd been caught and there was no point in fighting it. She continued to pick at the hangnail on her finger, determined to pull it clean off.

"...Or, i could keep it a secret... for a price that is."

"Well, what do you want then?" Teresa asked, the picking stopped. She had a look of desperation on her face as though she was willing to do just about anything... just where Murdoc wanted her.

"I'll think up of something, in the meantime, I'll pretend like i didn't hear anything..." Murdoc said smugly.

Teresa looked upon Murdoc with a faint scowl that was beginning to become more and more pronounced. She saw that he was smiling and it angered her dearly.

"You know Mr. Niccalls," Teresa began, muscles around her jaw tensing as she struggled not to raise her voice, "I was willing to believe before that the only reason you were so rude to me was because Russell had forced you into this situation, but now I know it's because you're a COMPLETE JACKASS!"

Her shrill yell made Murdoc laugh out loud, especially since he'd gotten her to flip her lid, infinitely more satisfying than simply startling her.

"well dearie, I'll let that one slide but you're simply going to have to be more careful from now on..." Murdoc said condescendingly. It was then that he noticed she'd been picking the cuticle on her right ring finger.

There was a silence between the two as they both sized each other up. Teresa had a look of absolute disgust and rage and Murdoc couldn't help but continue to smirk at her. He thought she looked cute when she was angry, at least there was something to her. The protracted silence caused Teresa to continue picking at her finger until she finally started bleeding.

"You're bleeding you know..." Murdoc said, as Teresa looked down to her hands. She simply brought the bleeding finger to her mouth and sucked off the blood, still looking intently at Murdoc.

"Excuse me," she said tersely and then left the bathroom. Murdoc watched her leave the bathroom. He then noticed a little something on the floor where she'd been standing.

There was a little drop of blood.

"Crazy bitch..." he muttered, before he made his way back to his room. He couldn't help but wonder what she'd been up to with 2D. He also felt very conflicted about her now that she had a semblance of a personality. He'd forgotten she lived there, just down the hallway, ripe for the picking. He was definitely going to have to watch her more closely, the fact that 2D got to her first? He just couldn't believe it, he was definitely going to get to the bottom of this.

The next morning, Murdoc saw 2D eating his cereal at the table and decided to seize the opportunity.

"Good morning ol' chap, hows it going?" Murdoc called out loudly. 2D involuntarily flinched and looked up at Murdoc.

"Err... nothing?" 2D replied tentatively.

"How's your breakfast? Everything you were hoping for?" Murdoc asked, pulling up a chair and sitting in it backwards, resting his chin on his arms, which rested on the back of the chair.

"What's going on...?" 2D asked, completely ignoring his cereal now. He didn't like this chipper tone that Murdoc had. He felt as if he was in for a lot of pain.

"Alright, I'll cut to the chase, I heard that you've been messing with the hired help."

2D's face went white and he started looking around to make sure they were alone.

"WHO told you that?" He asked in a harsh whisper. It was more concern and fear than anger.

"I overheard Teresa mentioning it to her friend over the phone... care to elaborate for me?"

"I don't think I should, i promised to keep it a secret, i don't want to piss Teresa off, she's kind of scary..."

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Murdoc asked 2D, privately agreeing with him. He could see Teresa intimidating 2D with her unchecked temper but found it hard to believe that she could scare a 6 year old, much less a normal 30 year old man.

"Well, you've probably never actually spoken to her but I have, she's cool and all but she's pretty intense if you give her a reason, she's like a mini-Russell..."

"Oh come off it, she's 5'3'!"

"You're 5'10' and you scare the shit out of me... listen, i don't want trouble..."

"Alright, well if that's the case, I'm sure Russell will be more convincing than i will..." Murdoc said, pretending to get up from the chair.

"You can't tell Russell!" 2D exclaimed, then looked around before he continued in a whisper, "Look, I'll tell you but whatever you do, don't tell Russell and please don't tell Teresa..."

"Alright then, spill it..." Murdoc said with a smirk, helping himself to 2D's cereal.

"So it was maybe 2 months ago, we both came back from a show..."

"You guys went to a show?"

"Err, yeah, she comes out with me every once and a while to get out of the house..."

"I always see her here..." Murdoc said thoughtfully, trying to remember if he'd ever seen her dressed up to go out.

"Well, she tends to do this when you're not here, she thinks you'll make a big deal and get her fired..."

"Well, she's a smart one, so continue, you guys went to see a show and then?"

"...and we're pretty sloshed so i walk her to her room and... you know" 2D said, trailing off so as to try to get out of finishing his sentence. He was hoping Murdoc would put two and two together.

"And...?" Murdoc asked, eating the cereal he had just taken off 2D.

"She kissed me." 2D blushed, he felt as though he was testifying to some sort of crime.

"That's it?" Murdoc asked, feeling as though he had just wasted his time.

"Well, there's more but I really don't think..." 2D started, abruptly interrupted by Murdoc who was increasingly annoyed.

"Well, you don't think, do you dullard? You might as well spill it before I give you something to think about."

"She gave me a handjob and I fingered her." 2D blurted out.

Murdoc was genuinely surprised and was silent for a few moments while 2D shifted in his seat. He supposed it was the fact that this was what she had referred to as "nothing." It was kind of a turn-on in a way, the fact that Teresa seemed so casual about it all.

"So did you guys..." Murdoc started to ask, narrowing his eyes in disgust. 2D cut him off to explain.

"No, just that... it just felt so awkward since she's more of a friend. We finished and then laughed because it was so awkward, but we're only friends." 2D said, hoping to clarify the situation to Murdoc in order to stop him from telling Russell.

Murdoc was still flabbergasted and unsure of what to say. He got up from his seat and made to walk out of the kitchen. He stopped short of 2D and gave him a hard punch in the arm, 2D yelped in pain.

"That's for flinching earlier..." he muttered and continued out. He made his way back to his room and noticed how clean the house was for the first time.


	5. Chapter 5, Drinking game

Teresa awoke one morning, looking forward to her two days off. It had been a few days since Murdoc had overheard her conversation in the toilets. She had contemplated telling Russell herself about getting involved with 2D just to neutralize the threat that Murdoc presented but decided against it. She decided that the best option was to start looking for another job and keep her head down in the meantime.

Teresa wasn't a stupid person, but damn it if she wasn't a bit emotionally unstable. She was determined to become relaxed and not let the looming threat of her unemployment get her down. 'First,' she thought, 'an inspection...'

By inspection, Teresa was thinking more in terms of a privacy measure and not of her duties around the house. She sat up in bed, grabbed her usual ponytail holder from the nightstand and gathered her long black hair into a bun. 'Perfection,' she thought, acknowledging the fact that she'd repeat the same action through the course of the day. She got out of bed and threw on some sweats and a bra, couldn't risk being caught in the semi-nude after all.

Teresa opened the door to her room and saw the request box that was put up outside her door. She decided to check it just to know what awaited her the next time she worked. She pulled out a small stack of requests and flipped through them...

"Laundry for 2D, cleaning kitchen pantry for Russell, bathroom cleaning for Noodle and 7 'kill yourself's' from Murdoc... perfect," she muttered to herself, throwing the papers back into the box.

Satisfied with checking her inbox, she continued scoping out the house. She decided it was best to begin with the kitchen, as the band members tended to hold their meetings there. She silently padded through the empty house, and looked to check for any messes that might of required her immediate attention. The last thing she needed was one of the band members looking for her while she was wanting to be left alone.

She'd cleared the first floor, the second floor and the third floor and now it was on to the car park. On the way, she peeked into 2D's room and verified that he wasn't there.

The car park was barren, just as she predicted. She thought she'd seen the blinds move in Winnebago but since Murdoc's Geep was missing, she figured it was just her imagination.

She turned to go back to her room and officially relax. There was a bottle of rum with her name on it.

...

Murdoc had heard a noise like the entrance to the car park had been opened and so peeked out his window to see what it was. It was only Teresa, looking around at nothing. He thought nothing of it, especially since he had company over, passed out on his mattress. He threw himself back into bed and dozed off.

...

Teresa was about 5 rum and cokes in before she'd gotten the bright idea to have a cigarette. Painting, listening to music and drinking all at once, it was a glorious day! She'd received a text from Russell right after her inspection informing her that the band was doing an interview and that they'd be out for virtually the entire day. Unbeknownst to her, Russell had not informed her that Murdoc had not joined them, he simply hadn't seen the need to.

Teresa walked to the kitchen and to the patio. She plopped herself down at the patio table, set her latest cuba libre down and dug out a cigarette from its pack. The lighter in her pocket initially refused to come out but she got it and lit her cigarette. From here she could see the estate in all its glory, or lack thereof. It was pretty grimy... she had to wonder why they hadn't hired a landscaper. Then she noticed the random zombies that wandered around the property and answered her own question.

She took the final drafts of her cigarette as she simultaneously prepared another one. Ideas swam in her head about what to do to her painting... then she thought she heard the door behind her slide open. She shot up and firmly grasped her drink, preparing for fight or flight, and put the unlit cigarette in her mouth for safekeeping. She turned around slowly and steeled herself for what could happen next.

Murdoc stood there looking at her incredulously, as though he hadn't expected her there.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" she asked, realizing that the drinks had definitely affected her gait.

"Are you smoking?" Murdoc asked with a furrowed brow, taking note of the unlit cigarette in her mouth and the fresh pack and lighter on the table.

"No, I'm doing my goddamn taxes... what are YOU doing here?" Teresa slurred, lighting her cigarette.

"Had a late night, decided to skip the interview and have a lie-in... are you drunk?" Murdoc asked, noticing that she was taking slow sips from her coke.

"I am... not!" She said, giggle-snorting before taking a draft from her cigarette.

"Since when do you drink and smoke?" Murdoc asked.

"Since when do you bluh bluh bluh..." Teresa mocked, finally taking a seat.

"What is it with guys thinking i don't do shit, like i'm some sort of virginal freak? Would it kill you to have an imagination?"

Murdoc was genuinely surprised at how drunk she was and the fact that she was smoking. Ever since that conversation with 2D, his perception of Teresa was beginning to change. He didn't even mind the abuse she was slinging his way. It was all too fascinating. He reached for her cigarettes and pulled one out.

"D'you mind?" he asked, indicating the cigarette.

"By all means, you're already holding the goddamned thing..." Teresa said sardonically, throwing the lighter at him. He sat down across from her and lit up.

"What you drinkin'?"

"Rum and coke, want some?"

"Yeah, sure..."

Teresa got up and disappeared into the house. She returned moments later with a handle of rum, her bottle of cola and an empty glass and set them down on the table.

"Make it yourself, I ain't your maid..." She said, then started cackling. She knew she was drunk.

Murdoc poured a good amount of rum into his glass and took it as a shot. He poured himself another and did the same thing.

"Woah, you'll want to slow down, this stuff's diabolical..."

"Didn't taste a thing love," he replied, then poured himself a cuba libre.

"Alright, suit yourself Mr. Niccalls, but don't say i didn't warn you," Teresa said, taking out another cigarette to light.

"It's alright love, you can call me Muds," Murdoc answered, taking a sip from his drink. He was beginning to warm up to her, now that she was a drunken mess.

"Cool I guess, even though you're still a jerk for blackmailing me."

"Ehh, I try... so what made you start drinking so early?"

"Ugh, you're like that pot calling the pot about...," Teresa thought for a moment, then hastily finished her sentence, "putting on the tea kettle or some shit."

"Yeah, i know..." Murdoc replied, resisting the urge to correct her.

"Say... Muds...," Teresa began, squinting her eyes as though she were in deep thought, "why are you such a cunt to me?"

"Err, why not?" Murdoc replied simply.

"Meh, point taken... I don't think i care anymore anyway..."

"You shouldn't."

"I won't then."

They drank in silence for a moment until there was a banging at the patio door. Teresa and Murdoc looked towards it and saw a naked blonde woman banging away.

"Looks like your date's lookin' for you..." Teresa said in a sing-song voice. She waved at the woman who had apparently failed to notice her there. The woman's eyes went wide and she dove out of view. Teresa let out a loud snort and started laughing.

Murdoc had realised why he was there in the first place, he'd wanted to see if there was any lube stashed away in his secret box in the kitchen. He'd seen that Teresa was sitting by herself outside and was looking to maybe talk to her a bit, try to get her to warm up to him. He had completely forgotten about the blonde waiting in his Winnebago, naked and ready for round three.

"Oops, gotta go love, got some business to attend to..." he said with a grin, getting up from his seat. His head spun and he leaned against the table, trying to stablize himself.

"Told you..." Teresa said, smoking her cigarette, looking off in the distance at the zombies.

"That's good," he said, pouring himself another shot and taking it.

Teresa turned to him to watch him take the shot and then found herself looking directly below his stomach paunch.

"Oh shit! I didn't even realise you were completely naked," Teresa exclaimed, looking directly at his junk and pointing. Murdoc looked down and indeed saw that this was the case, he could have sworn he had put on his y-fronts.

Murdoc shrugged at her and made to open the patio door, he noticed that she seemed to be checking him out. He took one last look outside and saluted her. She saluted him back nonchalantly, eyes focused on his junk.

'I'm such a shit-show,' she thought, shaking her head. The picked up her handle and her bottle of coke and headed back into the house to her room. She decided she needed to sober up before she humiliated herself any more.


	6. Chapter 6, Bar rats

It had been two weeks since the conversation on the patio. Murdoc was beginning to warm up to Teresa. He wasn't necessarily interested in dating her, but he was beginning to see why 2D had wanted to sleep with her at some point. Ever since he had that talk with her, he saw her as a normal person whom he didn't mind having around.

He had been in the studio tinkering with some samples and decided that he'd had enough. He turned off the lights, exiting the studio booth to find a drink. He had taken such a liking to Teresa's rum, he had bought his own bottle which was waiting in the bar in the den. He struted through the house and finally got to his destination. As he got there, he was just in time to see 2D and Teresa finish a conversation.

"Okay then, I'm ready," Teresa said, her back to Murdoc. She and 2D were looking down at a cell phone when Murdoc walked in.

"Whats going on then?" Murdoc asked suddenly, startling 2D and Teresa.

"Shit, didn't see you there," Teresa exclaimed. 2D simply looked surprise and said nothing. The two looked like they had been caught doing something forbidden. Murdoc noticed that Teresa and 2D were both dressed up as if to go out.

"Are you two going on a date?" Murdoc asked, a small wave of jealousy washing over him. He had sort of assumed that since she'd seen his dick then maybe she'd try to get with him next.

"No! No. Why would you think that?" Teresa asked, sounding as though she was trying to sound casual.

"Well, I just noticed that you're both huddled together and look like you're heading out... so what are you guys up to?" Murdoc replied. He noticed Teresa was looking somewhat distractedly at 2D's phone. 2D's surprise seemed to wane and he went back to tapping away at it.

"Well, there's not much going on right now though we're going to the bar," Teresa replied. At that moment, 2D's phone sounded an alert and Teresa directed her attention to the phone once again.

"Mind if I join you both then?" Murdoc asked, he hadn't been to the bar with 2D in quite a bit and was curious to see Teresa outside of the house, in a casual, neutral setting. He had also noticed that the outfit she wore really showed off her hourglass figure. He idly imagined her naked when 2D interrupted his thoughts.

"Sent him directions to the bar," 2D said, to which Teresa squealed giddily. She blushed and smiled, playing with her hair. Murdoc now noticed that she was wearing it down. He'd never seen it, he thought it was sexy. He also realized that 2D and Teresa had both ignored his question, which caused him to roll his eyes and address them once more.

"Alright if I come along?" Murdoc asked. The two turned to him and looked at him curiously.

"You sure Muds? i mean it's going to be a low-key thing..." 2D asked.

"Yeah, I mean, it's not that I don't want you there or anything but um..." Teresa began, but then hesitated. She was conflicted over what to say next. It was one thing to go to the bar with 2D, she was familiar with his habits but Murdoc was a different story. 2D had warned Teresa when she asked about inviting Murdoc along earlier that week that he was a handful as far as his drinking goes.

"Yeah, why not? I don't have anything better to do..." Murdoc replied, he was annoyed that they were trying to exclude him. He was certain it was 2D's doing, he was probably still sore about waking up in the back of a bread truck two towns over.

"Well, I guess you can come BUT," Teresa began, and then started blushing. Murdoc was beginning to lose his patience, he forgot about girls and their girly things.

"What love? Just spit it out, we're all adults here," Murdoc said impatiently.

"Okay, see, Stu is setting me up with his friend and I really, really want to fuck him so just, um... you know."

"No, i have absolutely no idea what you're on about..."

"Just don't block his cock from entering me."

"Did you really just say that, love?"

"Shut up, I'm serious, I want to get laid and I'm going to get laid one way or the other so do not INTERFERE," Teresa said with a fierce determination that Murdoc thought added to Teresa's attractiveness.

"Are we 'savvy' now?" she asked him after her mini-rant. Murdoc looked at 2D who could only shrug back, he had been sure she'd just mocked him.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, fine with me," Murdoc answered. He was surprised he hadn't berated her for talking to him the way she did. He supposed it had something to do with the cleavage peeking out of her low-cut dress. In fact he noticed that he had been looking at it for most of the conversation.

Murdoc went to get dressed for the bar himself and joined them that night. The bar the three arrived at was one of 2D's favorites and was a bit of a dive. The three ordered drinks and sat at a booth in the corner.

"So Stu, when's the dude supposed to show up?" Teresa asked, taking her first sip from her beer. She looked at it appraisingly and seemed to be tasting it.

"Dunno love, said he'd be here when he got off work so probably around 11," 2D responded then asked, "Something wrong with the beer?"

"Nah, just more coffee-ish than i thought it was going to be..." Teresa replied. 2D took a big gulp of his own beer as well, though he seemed to be satisfied with his.

Murdoc took a shot of tequila from the bottle he had just ordered and chased it with beer. Teresa looked at him incredulously and shuddered.

"What?" he asked, annoyed at her exaggerated reaction.

"Oh nothing, just traumatized by tequila, I can't drink the stuff anymore."

"Oh come on, I bet you can... why don't you take a shot love?" Murdoc said, egging her on. He was hoping to speed up the process of getting her drunk and hopefully intercept her date.

"Oh no, it's okay, I don't really want to get sloppy..." Teresa began, but was cut off by Murdoc.

"You won't, just one shot, I promise you won't get sloppy," Murdoc said with a devilish grin. Teresa was somewhat annoyed at his insistence and agreed to do it so as to get him to shut up.

"If I throw up, it's on you..." Teresa warned, pouring herself a shot. She placed her hand around the glass but then paused.

"Wait, I NEED a lime and some salt... fucking, 'spring break' cliche..." she requested, ending in a mutter. Murdoc rolled his eyes and handed her the salt shaker and one of the wedges of lime that the bartender included with the bottle.

Teresa psyched herself up and took the shot after taking a deep breath and licking the salt off her hand. 2D and Murdoc watched as she finished downing it and cheered when she didn't throw up.

"See love? Nothing to it!" Murdoc said, taking another shot himself.

The three drank heavily into the night, almost forgetting Teresa's blind date. When he did arrive, Teresa began focusing her attention on him, flirting with him very blatantly. 2D welcomed this and took it as an opportunity to go on the pull. Murdoc found himself feeling a bit jealous, especially since he was used to being the center of attention. He lingered at the table with Teresa and her date, who seemed to be put off by his presence.

"Can I get you a drink?" Teresa's date asked, though it would be Murdoc who would answer.

"Get me another beer, would you?" He requested. Teresa looked at him incredulously and then answered her date herself.

"Could I get some of that piss-water you're drinking to cap the night off?" she answered awkwardly. Her date furrowed his brow slightly but nonetheless agreed. Murdoc cackled at how emasculating Teresa could be without trying.

When Teresa saw that her date was at the bar, away from them, she turned to Murdoc.

"Okay, Muds, can you like, bounce when he comes back?" Teresa asked, sounding exasperated.

"Woah love, where's this coming from?" Murdoc asked, pretending to sound hurt.

"Oh shut up, I know what you're up to... It's not going to work, I think Dan and I..."

"His name is Marcus, love."

"Well, I think Marcus and I have some chemistry between us so I also think there's a big chance I'm getting laid, which is why I'd love it if you could just, you know... leave." Teresa finished. Murdoc was somewhat reluctant to do this since he was having a good time talking to her. Sure, he had been greedily imagining her on all fours since he saw her earlier, but she didn't have to know.

"I don't know love, you seem like you're smashed..." Murdoc began, only to be drunkenly cut off by Teresa.

"Look at 2D over there, amid the sea of skanks, are you going to let him beat you at your own game?" Teresa teased, her anger easing at the thought that Murdoc had showed a sliver of concern for her well-being. She saw that Marcus had finally succeeded in ordering their drinks and was making his way back to the table.

As he got there, he offered the drinks to the two. Murdoc excused himself to the bathroom to acquiesce to Teresa's request and Teresa promptly propositioned Marcus.

...

The next morning, Teresa stumbled into the house and towards her room wearing a pair of sunglasses. As she got to her room, Murdoc appeared down the hall.

"So how'd it go?" he asked.

"Mmmm..." she said, slightly shaking her head.

"Was it bad?"

"Terrible."

"What happened exactly?"

"He just got dumped so he started crying when we were fucking," Teresa began, interrupting herself with a loud burp and then continuing, "so we spent the rest of the night talking about it, sucked ass."

Murdoc burst out laughing and Teresa simply flicked him off and entered her room with a slam. He felt oddly satisfied, content that she hadn't gone off the market before he'd gotten a chance with her. He decided to let her sleep off her hangover.


	7. Chapter 7, La Cruda

Thought I'd write a short note since this chapter is so short. I don't know how often I'm updating this thing but rest assured, I will finish it one way or the other.

Any questions, comments, reviews? Do you like the story so far? Please pm or review please! Thanks.

Ok that's all.

* * *

Teresa awoke later in the day, head pounding from the previous night's drinking. As she sat up in bed, she realized that she had fallen asleep in her clothing.

There was now a snag in her tights. Great.

She slowly got up on her feet and went to the mirror. Her eyeliner was smudged, her hair was a mess and she saw that the sheets she slept on made an imprint on her cheek. It was a real horror show but nothing a shower couldn't fix.

Once she was cleaned up, she wore a comfortable pair of sweats and a t-shirt. Teresa decided to take it easy today and savor her time off as much as she could before starting work tomorrow.

Teresa sat up in bed and turned on the television, intending on relaxing for the rest of the afternoon and fall asleep early. She heard a knock at her door and sighed before she got up to answer it. 'So much for a lazy Sunday,' she thought.

She opened the door and saw that it was Noodle.

"Hey there Noodle, what's going on?" she asked, unable to mask the fatigue in her voice.

"Nothing really, just wanted to hang out a bit," Noodle answered, to Teresa's delight. She often came by to chat, especially since Teresa was often the only woman around who wasn't expressly there to hook up with either one of her bandmates.

"Oh, well in that case, come on in!" Teresa said brightly, waving Noodle in. Noodle sat in an armchair next to the nightstand by Teresa's bed. Teresa sat herself back on her bed and muted her television.

"So what's up Noodle, what have you been up to lately? It's been a minute since we've talked."

"I've been focusing on my school work and the new album so I haven't had much time to myself, you've been busy yourself I've noticed, the walls don't have those blood stains on them anymore."

"Ahh, quit it..." Teresa said bashfully. She was very proud of her work and always felt flattered when anyone pointed it out.

"Are you feeling okay?" Noodle asked, noticing the vacant look in Teresa's eyes.

"Nah, just had a rough night out with the guys, a bit tired," Teresa answered with a shake of her head. She rubbed her eyes and blinked a few times, almost as though she was trying to calibrate them.

"I noticed Murdoc went along, was he mean to you?" Noodle asked, she had seen the three go out together and remembered Murdoc's ongoing feud with the maid. She thought it was strange how fast he had seemingly gone from not even looking at Teresa to hanging out with her outside of the house. She felt something was afoot.

"Oh no, he was alright, kinda cramped my style but otherwise, he was polite," Teresa answered thoughtfully.

"Did he try to hit on you?" Noodle asked. While Noodle had just entered her teenage years, she wasn't very naive. She'd been privy to her bandmate's "adventures" and the resulting fallout. She knew about 2D's multiple hook-ups and the babies he'd produced. She'd overheard Russel's conversations with women whose number he'd gotten. She'd seen Murdoc manipulate people into doing things by sweet talking them and then forgetting about them once he'd gotten what he wanted. This third observation was what piqued her interest in the situation to begin with. How badly would things get if Teresa found herself in the same situation that countless groupies had before her...?

"Nah, I don't think it's like that," Teresa answered, "I mean he probably thinks I'm hot, but nah, he didn't hit on me."

Noodle giggled, she knew Teresa was joking though she suspected that she may have inadvertantly hit the nail on the head.

"He did successfully get me to drink tequila though," Teresa offered, immediately realizing that it meant nothing to Noodle.

There was a knock at the doorway.

"Come in!" Teresa called out.

2D poked his head into the room and addressed Noodle.

"Murdoc needs all of us to meet up in the studio, he says it's important."

"I'll be there in a minute," Noodle said, to which 2D simply nodded. He withdrew his head and closed the door gently.

"I guess I'd better go, otherwise he'll throw a tantrum," Noodle said, getting up from her seat.

"Alright girl, I'll talk to you later," Teresa said, "get the lights on your way out please."

Noodle turned off the lights to Teresa's room and left the room, shutting the door behind her.

Teresa turned the volume up on her television and watched it until she fell asleep.


	8. Chapter 8, If You Want to Go Out

The state of the mansion had greatly improved in the months that had passed since Teresa's hiring. Now that she didn't have any heavy duty cleaning projects, Teresa's workload had dwindled down to daily upkeep and whatever special tasks the bandmembers had for her. As a result, Russel had started giving her more days off.

The extra time made her mind more susceptible to introspection. There was a list of things that were beginning to bother her. Chief among these things was the fact that she hadn't gotten laid since that fiasco of a blind date a month ago, and it was such that it had made her decide to stop trying.

As she finished the day's to-do list, she decided that it was best not to think of it too much. Anyway, it was the weekend and she wanted to go out as soon as possible to get wasted, or stoned... or figured if anything else, Murdoc would probably come by her room eventually and invite her to the bar. Or to his Winnebago for booze and weed. At this point it didn't matter, she was pretty bored.

Ever since the aforementioned blind date, Murdoc and Teresa had become pretty good friends. She'd noticed that Murdoc had taken to inviting her out occasionally when he went to the bar. Other times, Murdoc simply texted her to join him in his Winnebago and the two would listen to music, get stoned and talk about general meaningless bullshit.

Teresa always felt obliged, especially since she had been nursing a secret crush on him. Lucky for her, it wasn't anything she couldn't handle. The only reason she hadn't tried to sleep with him was because she wished to keep her job. Russel had confronted her about the nature of her and Murdoc's friendship and also advised her to be wary of Murdoc. Murdoc later informed her he'd gotten interrogated as well, though he'd been threatened rather than warned.

Then there was the awkwardness that happened after she had made a move on 2D. Teresa was not remotely interested in repeating the experience with Murdoc.

Anyway, Murdoc was usually busy with his groupies so she imagined anything she had to offer wouldn't be novel enough to give her a minute of his time. Teresa was quite alright with this, especially since it was entertaining to watch.

Some of them cried and yelled, others hid their faces in shame but they all had to pass by Teresa's room and she usually received a knock on her door and a request to be let out.

She usually had no problems with this, especially since it tickled her when they'd ask her what their chances with Murdoc were or if he was the type to call back.

If her smirk didn't give the answer away, she didn't know what would.

Of course, in the back of Teresa's mind, she couldn't help but be slightly jealous of these women who'd literally done what she couldn't.

Teresa retreated to her room to shower and get dressed, tonight she'd go out by herself and try to take care of her dry spell.


	9. Chapter 9, The Night Before

For anyone that's keeping up with this story: I apologize for not updating sooner. Hope you enjoy. Also, just a reminder to read at your own discretion. I try not to get too graphic with this story but these days there's no telling who'll get offended at what. i like swear words and i don't like to use euphemisms too much. just sayin'.

* * *

The bar was not as busy as Teresa had expected it to be. A part of her saw it as an omen of things to come, but her desperation made her ignore this feeling. She resolved to talk to the first cute guy that offered to buy her a drink.

Ironically, for it not being very busy, it somehow took about an hour but eventually she ordered her first beer. She sat at the bar and read her text messages. She had just received one from Murdoc about hanging out at his Winnebago. Teresa sighed and thought that perhaps her idea to go out had been a mistake.

Just then a man dressed in a crisp suit came up to her while she sat at the bar. He seemed to strut as though he was very important which Teresa found somewhat annoying. Her desperation muted this feeling though, she wasn't in any position to be picky.

The man's name was Robert and he apparently liked talking about himself a lot. Teresa mentally checked out when the subject of his work-out routine came marching in the direction of the conversation.

Five beers and two shots of whiskey later, Teresa had finally felt she'd have enough drinks to justify going back home. Robert had finally gotten around to talking to her and asking her questions.

"So what do you do for a living?" He asked her, apparently oblivious to the fact that she'd taken to putting her head down on the bar slowly rose from her position and sat up.

"I'm a janitor," she said bluntly. She knew it wasn't technically true, but if having to mop up mysterious messes around Kong Studios hadn't earned her that title, she didn't know what would.

"Err, janitor?" Robert asked confused.

"Well, I'm a housemaid but it feels like being a janitor," she answered abruptly. Teresa motioned to the bartender to bring her another shot and the bartender simply nodded.

"Sounds interesting," Robert said, not bothering to disguise the fact that he was staring at Teresa's chest.

"Before you ask, no, I don't have a uniform," Teresa remarked. The bartender handed her her shot and she downed it. As she put her glass down she felt something press up behind her, and then she realized that Robert was there. She felt him sniff at her neck and it made her cringe.

"So how're you feeling?" he whispered in her ear in an attempt to seduce her. Teresa started feeling embarrassed for him.

"I'm..." Teresa started but then felt one of his hands move to cup her right boob. She delicately removed his hand and turned completely around to meet his gaze.

"I have to go pee," she said with an awkward smile. Teresa felt as though the boring night couldn't get any worse but it was sure as hell not going to get any better. She had no intention of coming back for more of whatever this was. She had once again renewed her vow of celibacy. Thank you Robert.

On the other hand, Robert had graciously picked up her tab long ago. Thank you Robert.

Teresa called a taxi home and tried to stay up on the way home. She didn't need to fall asleep in the cab and risk being overcharged for this.

As she stumbled drunkenly into the house, she thought of what drink would be the most suitable to end this miserable night with. Teresa reached the bar in the den and poured herself a cuba libre. This would serve her well as her nightcap, she thought as she sipped.

She was kinda hoping for a distraction and so decided that since Russel and Noodle were probably asleep and 2D was still out, maybe Murdoc would be handy for a chat. Maybe. Sometimes Murdoc would be gone for days before returning. No harm in checking his Winnebago, she thought. He had invited her earlier after all...

Teresa made her way to Murdoc's Winnebago with her drink in hand. She had already checked his room on the way to his Winnebago and hadn't seen him in there. As she came out to the parking garage, she noticed that there was some light coming from his window.

She walked towards the Winnebago, the sound of her drink clinking in her hand meshing with a sound of moaning and groaning coming from inside. Teresa smirked silently and paused to collect herself. Murdoc was probably in there watching some type of porn.

It was at this point that Teresa knew she was drunk since she found herself thinking how hilarious it would be to surprise him mid-wank. She thought of the look on his face that he'd probably get and how, knowing Murdoc, he'd completely be shameless enough to laugh with her afterwards. Of course, part of her was just horny as fuck and was just looking for an excuse to see him naked again.

Teresa stealthily creeped up to the Winnebago and tried her best to reduce the clinking noise of her drink. As she neared the door, she saw that it was slightly ajar. She could still hear all the sex sounds from the porn that was playing inside. For a moment she furrowed her brow when they sounded very lifelike, that is to say, as if it were live and not being played back. She shrugged this thought off and decided that when she heard the girl fake her orgasm, she'd make her move.

As soon as she heard her cue, Teresa violently kicked open the door and stepped in.

Teresa's initial reaction was shock. She simply stood there and watched him go at it with some random woman for what seemed like ages. Murdoc hadn't stopped what he was doing despite the door flying open. It was only when he looked up that he froze when he figured out who'd been responsible. Teresa was standing there with her eyes wide, taking a sip from her drink.

She saw the porn playing on the laptop screen nearby but she hadn't expected to see him nailing some chick who was on all fours.

Her second reaction was to almost squirt her drink out of her nose when she realized he still had his socks on.

Murdoc glared at Teresa, who noticed this and decided to retreat. She quickly ran out of the RV, slamming the door behind her.

Teresa walked towards her room drunkenly, the image of Murdoc fucking some groupie now tattooed into her mind's eye.

This was the dumbest night ever.


	10. Chapter 10, It's implied

Eh, adult themes. this stuff's pretty tame i think but i thought I'd throw in the warning anyway. I didn't really describe anything so whatever. Also, so short. I think this story is ending soon bc i don't see where else this could possibly go. that and I want to write something else for me. either way, enjoy.

* * *

While it was true that she'd been invited earlier in the evening, the fact that she had failed to respond to his text had annoyed him. He waited all of 10 minutes before deciding to look for entertainment elsewhere.

Not that he'd ever tried anything with Teresa before, but he'd always been hopeful she'd let her guard down enough to make a move on him. The two had been getting progressively more permissive with each other in terms of sharing personal space. 'It was only a matter of time,' he thought.

Currently however, Murdoc was coming to grips with the fact that Teresa had brought his night to a screeching halt. He tried to ignore his unexplained embarrassment and carry on with the evening's plans but felt too distracted to do so.

'She is pretty drunk and just walked in on you having sex with a groupie; That wasn't too bad,' Murdoc thought as he attempted to calm down. Then he thought of how she laughed at him and found that he couldn't go on with the night without addressing the issue.

Murdoc had sent away the groupie when he realized he wasn't going to be able to perform any more. The woman initially protested but was then pacified with a promise that he'd give her a call the next day.

Murdoc knew he wouldn't do that, but none of it mattered anyway. He threw on a pair of jeans and made his way to Teresa's room. He didn't bother to knock on her door and entered her room just as abruptly as she'd entered his Winnebago.

Teresa was standing at her open window wearing a satin robe and leaning out to smoke. She turned with a start, surprised by the bang made by the door. Her eyes were wide, lit cigarette dangling from the corner of her mouth. She crossed her arms and closed her robe tighter.

"What do you want?" she asked, slurring.

"What the hell was that?" Murdoc exclaimed, he stormed in and stopped about a foot short of her.

"Jeez, sorry, just thought you were alone..." Teresa said, taking a draft from her cigarette. The two stared at each other for a bit before Murdoc noticed that her robe was not only very thin but also inside out.

"I'm not even going to attempt to reason with you right now, you're obviously drunk beyond comprehension," Murdoc said incredulously.

"It's not a big fucking deal Murdoc, you've seen me drunk plenty of times."

"You DID just walk in on me having sex."

"Who the fuck cares? It's not like your dick fell off because of it or something..."

"It may as well have, the way you fucking laughed."

"Why are we even talking about this? Isn't that girl waiting for you?"

"She's gone, you killed the mood walking in on me like that."

Teresa had been somewhat calm, if not amused up until this point. Murdoc watched her face tighten and her eyes narrow.

"Oh fuck off, what do you want me to do about it? I was about to go to bed after this cigarette but apparently you're upset with me and we HAVE to do this right now," Teresa snapped, apparently having had her fill of the conversation.

"So you're not apologizing..." Murdoc said, trying to keep his anger in check at her belligerence.

"Am I supposed to?"

"I'd say a fucking apology is in order for invading someone's privacy."

Teresa rolled her eyes and turned away from Murdoc to her window. She put out her cigarette on the windowsill and threw it out of her window before closing it, much to Murdoc's annoyance. Murdoc glared at her as she went to close her bedroom door. He was angry at her for being dismissive of him and wanted nothing more than to berate her. At least until he noticed that her robe had become loose again and this time he could see her breasts peeking out from underneath. He could think of more entertaining things to subject her to...

"Love, you know your tits are out, right?" He asked, all the while keeping focus on them.

Teresa seemingly ignored him and simply took her robe off altogether. Murdoc could only stand there and stare at her as she made her way back to him. He could feel his anger slowly beginning to wane in favor of arousal.

'Not a bad turnout for the night, all things considered,' Murdoc thought as he felt Teresa undo his fly.


	11. Chapter 11, The Morning After

Teresa blinked her eyes open and blearily looked towards the alarm clock glowing at her nightstand. She struggled to get a grasp on her consciousness and felt that her brain was running like a slow computer.

She knew it was a Sunday, which was great since she was also beginning to notice a dull throbbing in her head. She knew that she had gone to the bar last night and that it hadn't gone exactly as planned. This probably explained the throbbing, and the fact that her already vague memory completely went blank around the part where she got into a taxi. How much had she had to drink, exactly?

A single pang of guilt was felt in her stomach, though she dismissed it as her stomach wishing to expel its contents. Come to think of it, she did still feel a little drunk... She hadn't really remembered how exactly she had gotten into her room after all. In fact, she didn't even recall opening the door to the mansion in the first place.

The feeling of guilt re-surged and it seemed to start to pool in Teresa's stomach, forcing her to address this sensation. Had she left the door to the mansion unlocked, perhaps?

Teresa shifted to lie on her back and it was then that she abruptly ceased attempting to take an inventory of the last night's events. The form that lay in her peripheral had shocked her into full and unmerciful consciousness. The guilt that had welled up in her stomach was fermenting into regret as she realized that she was naked.

Teresa closed her eyes and breathed in deeply. Her inability to remember what happened had made her fear what may have literally been laying before her. She wanted to believe that it had been a figment of her imagination. There was no faint snoring beside her and she had definitely misconstrued a pillow for a torso.

She sighed, eyes still closed and steeled herself for the reveal. While she was sure it was all some sort of groggy illusion, a nagging feeling in the back of her mind said otherwise. There was simply no way, right? Teresa gingerly turned her head towards the other side of her bed and slowly opened her eyes once again. Her stomach dropped as she instantly recognized Murdoc snoring gently beside her.

Teresa stared at him for a moment as she lay next to him. The dull throbbing in her head had been upgraded to a full-on pounding. He was lying on his stomach, his head turned away from her. His heavily tattooed back rose and sank in time with his snoring.

If she hadn't already been lying down she might have fainted but instead, Teresa looked up to the ceiling and silently panicked.


	12. Chapter 12, What They Never Tell You

Eh. nothing to see here in this intro text.

* * *

A couple of weeks had passed since Murdoc had woken up in Teresa's bed and he hadn't really spoken to her or seen much of her around. Come to think of it, he hadn't even seen her the morning after they fucked when he woke up in her room.

The first few days of their estrangement were intentional, he wanted to make certain she wouldn't misconstrue that night's events. Besides this minor detail, everything seemed to be going as usual.

When the second week came around however, he was beginning to feel somewhat strange about not hanging out or talking to Teresa. Sure he had seen her around the house and they'd been cordial with each other, but it wasn't the same.

Murdoc felt at odds with himself.

On the one hand, he was glad that she had given him his space and kept her distance. He'd had several "dates" come over since and Teresa seemingly had absolutely no problem with it.

On the other, why hadn't she tried to have a drink and a chat with him yet? While it was true that he hadn't texted or called her for anything, job-related or otherwise, he had half-expected her to come after him.

Eventually, Murdoc's vanity got the better of him and he found himself walking around the mansion aimlessly, hoping to "casually" run into Teresa as she went about the day's given tasks. He'd even asked his band mates if they'd seen her around.

Russell was the one who divulged her whereabouts, which was in the den vacuuming and shampooing the rugs. He walked towards the den and sure enough saw her painstakingly running a vacuum across the room's large area rug. Teresa had her headphones on and was oblivious to Murdoc's entrance.

Murdoc caught Teresa's attention however, and waved her over. She turned the vacuum off and approached him, looking somewhat confused.

"What's up?" She asked, stopping to stand in front of him. Murdoc got nervous all of a sudden, he wasn't sure why.

"How've you been?" Murdoc asked, somewhat timidly. He saw that Teresa was giving him a weird look, as though she was trying to figure him out.

"I've been good? How about you?" Teresa asked, furrowing her brow.

"That's good... so, what have you been up to?" he questioned, his confidence beginning to return to him. He couldn't think of the last time he'd had this much trouble talking to a girl.

"Not much I suppose, just cleaning the rugs and other stuff," Teresa said casually.

"Do you have a minute to talk... you know, not here?" Murdoc asked, feeling very vulnerable out in the den where they could be walked in on at any moment. At this point he just wanted to address that night and finally clear the air. He wanted to know that she wasn't upset with him too much.

"I mean I'm sort of busy right now, you know? Can this wait for later?" Teresa asked incredulously. Murdoc was embarrassed that he had even asked the question, and now Teresa was essentially telling him to fuck off in less aggressive terms. He hadn't felt this sensation since he was a schoolboy, before all the rock god mythology that had been built up around him.

"Err, sure... Come by the Winnebago when you've finished, yeah?" Murdoc asked.

"Ok, sounds good," she said as she walked back to her vacuum.

This behavior was really beginning to disturb him.


	13. Chapter 13, One Beer

Hey, it's me again. I don't know how much longer. If it stops abruptly it's because I don't even know anymore.

Hope you enjoyed thus far. Thanks to the person who reviewed my story. that made my day.

Happy reading. sorry if too OOC, didn't mean to. :P

* * *

Murdoc idly watched TV in his Winnie when he heard a knock at its door. He suddenly felt the fluttering at his stomach that he had been ignoring since he had had the awkward conversation with Teresa in the den. Must've been something he ate. He got up to answer the door and predictably, Teresa was there on the other side of it.

She looked tired and hadn't bothered to change her dirty clothing. Apparently she'd just gone straight to his as soon as she had finished all her duties for the day.

"Come in love," he said, stepping aside to let her in.

Teresa walked in and slammed the door shut behind her. She made herself at home and sat down on a nearby chair.

"So what's up? What did you need to talk about?" she asked, looking over at him. Teresa's gaze was making Murdoc nervous and he was beginning to regret asking her over for a talk. He was inexplicably at a loss for words, especially since he was usually the one who loved to command any given conversation.

"Errr so... d'you fancy a drink?" Murdoc asked feebly.

"Umm, sure, what do you have?" Teresa asked.

"I've got a couple of beers in the mini-fridge if you want one."

"Piss-water?"

"Stout."

"Ok, sign me up."

Murdoc handed her a beer and took one for himself.

"Don't worry, I'll take it easy this time," Teresa said with a smirk. Murdoc was hoping she would bring that night up so he wouldn't have to. He felt enough of a twat as it was, he didn't want to advertise the fact that that night was the reason he had invited her to his in the first place.

"You what?" he asked, pretending to be confused.

"Oh you know, that time I was shit-faced and we ended up fucking two weeks ago," Teresa answered before chugging from her beer.

"Oh, I almost forgot about that," Murdoc lied. He had been replaying it constantly in his head since it happened. In fact as he was looking at her that moment, he thought about all the dirty things the two had done in the privacy of her room.

"Heh, me too... I mean I remember seeing you fuck some chick in here but that's about it," Teresa said thoughtfully. Murdoc's face fell somewhat, how could she not remember?

"You don't remember what happened?" Murdoc asked. He was confident that sounded like he was being casual and not disappointed.

"Nah, not really. I mean like I said, I do remember walking in on you fucking that girl but that's as far as I've been able to remember clearly. I guess I remember bits and pieces but I mostly assumed we fucked since I woke up naked next to you," Teresa explained.

"Yeah we did," Murdoc confirmed, nodding slightly.

"Hey, I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable... I'm actually glad we're talking right now since I thought you were mad at me," Teresa said, smiling a little at him.

"Don't worry about it love, I thought you were the one who was mad at me for ducking out while you were out of the room," Murdoc said.

"I wasn't mad and I wasn't avoiding you, I've just been very busy. If anything I was surprised that you were still there when I woke up," Teresa said, sipping on her beer.

There was an awkward silence as the two drank their beers. Teresa cleared her throat and Murdoc sniffed loudly.

"You up to anything tonight?" Murdoc asked, in the interest of breaking the silence.

"Well, I have a date but I kinda feel tired so I don't know," Teresa commented.

"You've got a date tonight?" he asked, not bothering to hide his disappointment.

"Yeah, I guess I do. I'm sorta dreading it though."

"Why is that?"

"Because it means I have to take a shower and get dressed up when I'd rather just stay in and go on the internet or watch a movie or something."

"Why don't you just cancel?"

"Ugh, I hate flaking out on people..."

"I suppose..."

"That and well... I have needs too you know."

"So you're fucking him?"

"Hell no! I tried to the first date around but he insisted that we wait," Teresa answered irritably.

Murdoc laughed out loud as Teresa rolled her eyes in irritation. She chugged at her beer again.

"Gee, thanks for laughing at my misfortune," she said sarcastically as he continued laughing.

"Sorry, sorry... the guy just sounds like a total git," Murdoc responded, laughing a bit more afterwards.

Teresa simply looked away from Murdoc and got up from her seat.

"Where you going?" Murdoc asked. Teresa stretched her arms up and yawned.

"I'm going to go get ready for my date with a git, if it's alright with you."

"Aww come on Teresa, I was only teasing, come here..." Murdoc said, gesturing for Teresa to come in for a hug. Teresa reluctantly walked up to Murdoc and obliged. The two hugged each other and stayed that way for a while. Teresa involuntarily nuzzled at Murdoc's chest and then abruptly slackened her hold on him.

"Heh, maybe I should go," Teresa said nervously. She looked up at Murdoc, whose arms were still around her waist.

"It's ok..." Murdoc assured her, looking at Teresa's blushing face.

Teresa opened her mouth as though she was about to say something but Murdoc crammed his tongue down it before she could get out a word. It hadn't taken long before the two were in a full-on make out session, complete with groping.

The two made their way towards Murdoc's bed and completely ignored the fact that their fail-safe of excusing it on being intoxicated was absent.


	14. Chapter 14, Odd?

Sorry so late, tried to write it without being a total bore. kthx.

* * *

2D was having trouble sleeping. Again. He tossed and turned in bed, unable to relax long enough to become drowsy and let himself sink into sleep. The room began getting too hot, he threw his sheets off. Now it was too cold, he sat up to pull them back on. His pillow wasn't supporting his head very well... There was no shortage of discomfort here.

He sat up and thought for a minute Maybe he just needed a drink of water or some warm milk, even. 2D got up from his bed and slipped on some pajama bottoms and some house slippers. He'd head into the kitchen, he thought, and pour himself a tall glass of water or warm milk. Or both. Why not?

He made his way to the kitchen and walked up to the cupboard to take out a glass tumbler. He approached the refrigerator and put the tumbler to the water dispenser. As the water slowly poured into the glass, he idly put his hand into his pocket. There was some sort of pill there. He casually took it out and popped it in his mouth. He chased it with water and stood there for a moment, hoping to feel the effects of having quenched his psychosomatic thirst. A few minutes passed and he decided he would just go ahead and warm some milk up. Wouldn't hurt him anyway.

The microwave stopped with a beep and 2D retrieved its contents. He set it down at the kitchen table and waited a few minutes for it to cool down a little.

2D finished his milk with a satisfied sigh and rinsed out the cup he was using before he walked towards the kitchen entrance. As he walked down the hallways, he noticed an odd sound coming from the direction of the recording studio. He figured it was probably just Russel pouncing on an idea he'd just come up with.

His curiosity got the better of him and he decided to go investigate. He had definitely seen some light coming from the door cracks. Besides, he felt as though he was probably never going to fall asleep so maybe he'd be of some help to Russel.

2D opened the door and was greeted with a generous view of Murdoc bonking some chick at the mixing board. 2D wasn't too phased at the sight, he couldn't count the times he had seen this exact scenario before. Not to mention the numerous times he'd seen Murdoc wandering around the house in the nude. It was par for the course and so 2D thought very little of it.

Murdoc froze almost instantly in his place and stood perfectly still, as though doing this would make him invisible. The woman moved from her position to duck behind the table, a feat that impressed 2D given the apparent difficulty and speed of her movement.

2D shook his head, turned around and left. He shut the door behind him. It was a pretty good giggle, 2D thought, but he could've gone without seeing Murdoc naked one more time. He would have to get Teresa to disinfect that mixing board first thing next morning.

2D decided that he needed to empty his full bladder before he could get back to his room, so he took a little detour to the toilets.

After washing his hands and leaving the bathroom, he saw Teresa hurriedly walking towards her room. 2D greeted her and was about to ask what she was doing up so late but she quickened her pace and slammed the door behind her.

2D shrugged and walked back to his room, he'd ask her later in the day after he'd gotten his sleep.

He reached his room and sat at his bed, thinking a little of his current predicament. He tried to decompress, to mull things over before going to bed. He figured that maybe that what was he needed to do in order to fall asleep.

He thought about what had just happened, how Murdoc seemed to react. He realized that Murdoc wasn't really ever the type to be ashamed or embarrassed about getting caught having sex. If anything, Murdoc would usually continue doing what he was doing and tell him to leave. That look of utter surprise was very odd.

Come to think of it, another odd thing was the feeling of familiarity he had when he saw the woman's naked form. He hadn't been able to catch a glimpse of her face since her hair was all over the place but he'd gotten a good look at the rest of her body. He felt as though he'd seen her somewhere before. Maybe in a girly mag? A raunchy text message? Perhaps a film... he was really straining to remember now.

2D wasn't usually the type to put the pieces together right away but when he did, it usually came with little to no impact to his life. He was the type to take things at face value and his meds usually ensured his blissful ignorance or apathy.

But where HAD he seen her? The question began gnawing at him.

And then it hit him, the answer was becoming glaringly obvious. In fact, the answer had slammed her door at him earlier.

He had just caught Murdoc fucking Teresa in the recording studio.

It was all beginning to make sense, at least the last few months anyway. The fact that Murdoc now seemed to tag along with him and Teresa every time they went out. How Teresa hadn't bothered 2D to set her up with any more of his mates lately. Their petty behavior when it came to either one flirting around with other people.

This epiphany brought up a few more questions as well though. Was this the first time? Were they dating or not? How long exactly had this been going on? Where else had they had sex at?

The questions flooded 2D's mind and he was going to stay up to figure out all the answers! Or at least he would have if that pill hadn't kicked in.

As 2D fought the drowsiness, he tried his hardest to remember what he had just uncovered. Chances were, however, he would probably forget the whole thing tomorrow.


	15. Chapter 15, A Couple of Flashbacks

Hello all. I'm not really focused and i think i'm overthinking this story but maybe i won't anymore and I'll get it done quicker. I think it's near its end anyway.

Squeeky714 asked "I'm wondering why you titled this "Death on the Stairs." Are/were you going to kill someone off?"

The answer is its named after a Libertines song. If you've heard the song... well it's a clue to how the story will probably end. I just like it. That being said, I'm not going to kill anyone off. Not physically anyway. Thanks for the question! :)

* * *

When Russel had met Murdoc for the first time, it was to audition for what would later be Gorillaz. Initially, Russel didn't think much of Murdoc, though he had observed some histrionic tendencies.

As Russel played for Murdoc, he noticed that Murdoc seemed to look on at him in rapture. Russel hadn't found this too odd, he knew he had some pretty dope skills, but it did leave him with a sort of unsettling feeling. A feeling that suggested to him that he was getting himself into more things than he bargained for.

The two celebrated Russel's joining the band later that night at the local pub. Though Russel had a liberal amount of drinks that night, his mind was still sharp and he hadn't ignored how Murdoc would tip-toe around some of his questions or just outright change the topic of the banter at hand when it seemed to suit him. Russel's confirmation of Murdoc's dodginess came right as he waited for him to come back before closing time and found himself paying the whole of the tab.

Against his better judgment, Russel decided to meet Murdoc the next day at their agreed time, just as they'd discussed before Murdoc had stuck him with the bill. Murdoc welcomed him in to Kong Studios and mentioned some of the things they had discussed the night before. He'd even introduced Russel to the other members of the band; a tall lanky man named Stuart and his girlfriend Paula. Russel noticed that Murdoc never mentioned, apologized for, or acknowledged having skipped out on the bill.

In the end however, Russel decided to go with it as he was just too entertained by Murdoc. From then on he'd come up with a protocol for living with him as it had become necessary when he moved in to the studio.

Russel lived by the cardinal rule that Murdoc had no real feelings to speak of and was thereby impossible to take seriously. He could remain stoic in the face of Murdoc's over-the-top criticisms and ridiculous demands. This in turn, made Murdoc feel somewhat insecure and inadvertently fostered a mild fear of retribution from Russel in him. Murdoc would later go on to learn that his fear was not unfounded.

...

Cut to the present day.

As Russel mulled over his memories, he quietly sat in front of the television in the den and gently shook his head. As he remembered the present day nuisances, a more recent memory had just come to mind.

...

It happened about a week ago during a particularly stressful rehearsal. In fact it had been so stressful that he had involuntarily rolled his eyes as he thought about it that moment.

The band was completely bushed after nearly 8 hours in the studio, 4 of which consisted of Murdoc delivering his latest polemic against 2D and why he was so utterly useless.

This didn't really shock Russel, he'd been privy to many of them in his time with the band. The key thing that stood out at him from that dreadful evening was the bat-shit crazy behavior that he'd witnessed following it.

About two thirds into Murdoc's rant, Teresa walked by the doorway to the studio and waved at them as she passed by.

Murdoc stopped mid sentence and turned towards her.

"Wait right there, I need to talk to you..." Murdoc said looking at the doorway, as though expecting her to reappear.

She did.

It was at this time that Russel had noticed that the others seemed to conveniently become enthralled in other things. Noodle was focused on her hand movements as she practiced her finger exercises and 2D stared out a nearby window. Russel felt as though he was missing something.

"What? What is it now?" Teresa snapped, rolling her eyes.

"Come here love..." Murdoc said, motioning her closer. His expression was now that of a shrewd appraisal.

"I'm sort of in a hurry so what do you want?" Teresa asked tersely. She shuffled over reluctantly and crossed her arms.

"2D told me that you were trying to get off with one of his mates last night..." Murdoc began but seemed to falter when he saw that Teresa's eyes had narrowed and were now focused on 2D. The situation was beginning to make Russel feel both very uncomfortable and angry.

"Can we talk about this later?" Teresa muttered. Russel felt as though he was back in high school watching an argument go down between a couple. Noodle and 2D seemed to become even more interested in their own activities and fervently ignored the awkward situation.

Russel feared that his recent suspicions of the two fucking around with each other were true. He had been noticing some strange behavior from the two for a while now and this seemed to speak to the motivation behind it.

"Well is it true?" Murdoc quizzed incredulously. His hand was now firmly gripping her arm.

"Well no, it's not true because I DID get off with him, as you call it." Teresa replied dryly. She violently pulled her arm out of his grip. At this point Russel noticed that 2D and Noodle could no longer ignore what was going on. The two had joined in the silent staring.

"I can't believe you're being so casual about it!" Murdoc exclaimed angrily.

"Yeah, so? Why does this even matter? We'll talk about it later..." Teresa said, apparently ignoring Murdoc's glower.

"TOUGH SHIT, WE'RE SETTLING THIS ONCE AND FOR ALL!" Murdoc snapped, apparently irritated at the fact that Teresa continued to act so unfazed.

"What EXACTLY is there to settle then, Murdoc?" Teresa asked, no longer encumbered with the presence of the rest of the band. Conversely, now that Teresa had given in to his demands, Murdoc was beginning to nervously eye the rest of the band.

Russel caught Murdoc's eye briefly. He was sure he knew where this conversation was going and that Murdoc now regretted having it in front of everyone.

"Well Murdoc? What was so FUCKING important that you couldn't wait until later when everyone wasn't here to watch?" Teresa asked impatiently.

"Err... well, it's just that..." Murdoc began feebly, much to Teresa's annoyance.

Russel had decided he'd had enough of this and decided to end it once and for all.

"Hold up, are you both dating each other?" Russel asked. The two looked towards Russel but Teresa spoke up first.

"Hell no, we aren't dating!" She exclaimed, as though she couldn't believe that anyone could think that way. Murdoc did a double-take and looked back at Teresa.

"Yes we are actually, and I'm fucking sick of you pretending otherwise," Murdoc retorted.

"Look, I don't really give a fuck if you guys are dating or not, but ya'll can't be doing this shit at practice. Are ya'll fucking kidding me with this? Teresa, Murdoc... I warned you both about fucking around with each other. This practice is fucking over, I'm so sick of this bullshit..." Russel grumbled. He got up and left, he was tired and hungry and didn't see the point of continuing after the major interruption they had experienced.

...

As Russel placed his focus to the present time once again, he sighed and leaned back into his seat. He wasn't quite sure how this shitshow was going to pan out.


	16. Chapter 16, a desperate man

Hello, it's me again. Tell a friend. lol, jk.

Hopefully this chapter was worth it. i'm going to have an ending for this fic whether i like it or not dammit.

not "graphic" warning but graphic-ish. Graphique... you know, language... imagery. that type of thing. I don't get explicit and I never will but real life isn't as pg as the movies might make it seem. the older you get the more you realize how stupid "adult content" is.

but enough, on with this fic.

* * *

It had been almost two months since the incident at the studio space.

There was a mutual passive-aggressive evasion between Murdoc and Teresa that had begun since the day after, when the two apologized gingerly and agreed to disagree on the nature of their friendship/relationship. The two had seemingly done their best to avoid talking to each other as if they were in some sort of bizarre standoff. They had both resorted to very brief yet polite words when necessary and relayed everything else via the other three housemates.

Now however, Murdoc's anger had begun to wane. He hadn't given up on fucking around with his groupies in the past two months but he found himself wanting to hang out with Teresa again. In fact, he had noticed that these thoughts had become more and more persistent lately.

It had gotten to the point that he'd begun asking the women he was fucking around with if they had gotten a chance to meet Teresa. If they ever replied they had, he would follow it up with questions about Teresa's opinion of him. Oddly enough, this didn't deter most of the groupies from going through with their encounter with him, though he noted that most were more a lot easier to shake off this way.

The latest groupie he had invited in had decidedly become the turning point in his abstinence against Teresa. While the night had gone smoothly and the brunette he was currently receiving a blow job from was very attractive, he just couldn't keep his mind in the room...

What was Teresa up to that night? Did she care that he'd gone home with this person? He sighed out loud as he thought of these things, prompting his guest to stop what she was doing.

"You like that?" the brunette asked, seemingly trying to sound as seductive as possible. He looked down at her, almost having forgotten that she was there and gave a noncommittal shrug. The woman continued what she was doing and Murdoc sighed again, this time giving a small chuckle.

He remembered Teresa's comment about how she posited that it was impossible to look pristine right after a blow job, not that it had prevented her from giving him some of the best oral sex he'd had. This thought got him a little harder but he noticed there was nothing going on down there anymore.

"Do you even want me to do this anymore?" The brunette inquired, this time sounding unmistakably annoyed. Murdoc looked down to see her angry face looking back at him now. He stifled a smirk, he just couldn't help but agree with Teresa on the oral sex thing.

"Honestly love, I don't really care if you do," he finally answered after a moment. He wasn't feeling it anymore. The woman got up swiftly and forcefully slapped him in the face before finally storming out of the Winnebago.

'Teresa would have laughed...' he thought.

Murdoc got up from his seat and tucked himself into his pants before zipping up. Only alcohol could salvage the night. The groupie was gone, there was no one to talk to him since everyone was out partying and he just felt a miserable knot in his stomach.

...

Murdoc ventured into the empty mansion and made his way to the kitchen. He knew 2D had stupidly left his beer in the fridge so he thought to steal a few and make his way back to the Winnie.

As he opened the door to the kitchen, Murdoc found himself unexpectedly staring at Teresa as she gathered up her cleaning supplies and packed them on to her little janitor's cart. The knot in his stomach seemed to tighten and lurch. Though he had hoped to see her that night, he hadn't actually thought he would run into her there. Especially this late.

Teresa greeted Murdoc curtly, giving him one of those fake, bitchy smiles as she walked passed him and out of the kitchen, her supplies in tow on a cart behind her. He turned around and watched her go down a hallway and turn the corner.

Murdoc understood that his pride as a human being was in jeopardy. He stood for a brief moment, attempting to ignore his instinct and finally gave in. He turned around completely and went in the same direction that Teresa had headed to. He saw her cart was parked outside of the bathroom and proceeded to walk in. Murdoc stood silently, blocking the door to the bathroom and looked towards the stalls.

After a few moments of waiting and a flushing sound, Teresa abandoned the bathroom stall she had just previously made use of. Teresa looked at Murdoc hesitantly, as though she had been hoping that he wasn't actually there. Murdoc wasn't sure what was going on in her mind but decided he would wait until she spoke.

"So... what do you want?" She asked finally. She went up to the mirror and began washing her hands. If she was trying to act disinterested as hell she accomplished her goal.

He noticed that Teresa watched him from the corner of her eye as she pretended to care more about the state of her pores than what he had to say. She dried her hands with a paper towel and started tracing the bridge of her nose, her attention exclusively on the bathroom mirror.

"Would you mind looking at me?" Murdoc asked, growing slightly impatient. He felt as though he knew what she was thinking.

"I can hear you just fine Murdoc, go ahead," Teresa said, ignoring his request. She continued her examination, much to Murdoc's annoyance. Murdoc knew that Teresa saw his request as some sort of power play.

"Teresa, you know what I want to talk about, could you please indulge me this one time?" Murdoc said, trying hard not to sound as if he was pleading. Not counting the time spent ignoring each other these past few weeks, Murdoc had noticed how easy it was to lose his composure when she was stoic.

Teresa finally turned, as though seemingly picking up on his weakness. She didn't smile or frown, but just looked at him blankly, as though waiting for him to say something else. Murdoc obliged.

Murdoc approached her cautiously but stopped at arm's length. He wasn't proud about what he was about to do and so he didn't want his proximity to feel unnecessarily needy. He'd made up his mind. Pride be damned, he would do anything for a lay. Not to mention he sort of missed Teresa this whole time.

"Look Teresa, I just want to talk to you," Murdoc said, finishing with a deep breath. It took a lot out of him to blurt it out like he did and even then he'd been too embarrassed to look her in the eye. He looked up at Teresa after a moment and saw that she had a faint sneer on her face. Not necessarily the reaction he was hoping for but he would take it over the stoicism.

"That's it? Okay Murdoc," Teresa said sardonically as she rolled her eyes.

"You're a cunt, you know that?" Murdoc muttered. He'd secretly been turned on by her reaction but felt as though acting on this would throw his plans awry. He realized he was taking a gamble with this move but anything was better than giving in and possibly being rejected by her.

Murdoc never thought he'd have the capacity to feel this self-conscious about interacting with a woman… especially when he thought about the past few weeks. Still, he could feel his stomach lurch as she looked at him.

"Murdoc, what do we got to talk about?" Teresa asked tersely. She crossed her arms and cocked her head to the side, shrewdly looking at him.

"Can't you just stop being a cunt for a minute?!" Murdoc exclaimed, attempting to guilt her into conceding. She definitely has caught on, he thought.

"I've been nice to you this whole time. Is that what's bothering you? Was I supposed to be a hot mess these past couple of months?"

"Err, no... but I feel like things aren't so good between us right now and I just want us to be friends again."

Shit. There was too much honesty in what he last said.

"But Murdoc… we ARE friends. You seem to be confused."

"But you're so…" Murdoc faltered. Fuck. He knew if he finished that sentence it would be her game. Teresa was always good about reading between the lines with him.

"So… so…" Teresa prodded, much to his annoyance. Murdoc knew she was daring him to finish the sentence, she'd done this to him on multiple occasions. It never got any less intimidating.

"Well… you know… you've been distant."

"Shit, you think?!"

"Forget it…" he muttered as he began to come back to his senses. He remembered why they had come to their current state and there was only so much humiliation he could bear. He was horny, he thought, that's all this is. The two looked at each other for a moment

Teresa walked a couple of steps closer to Murdoc and put her hand on his shoulder. Her sneer was now completely visible and her glaring eyes did nothing to help it. She looked very dangerous. And it turned Murdoc on so much.

"Murdoc, babe, listen," Teresa began, pausing for effect. Murdoc noticed that her right hand gripped his left shoulder slightly as though attempting to brace him from the forthcoming news, "We can't go back to whatever it is that we had before that clusterfuck of an argument."

She paused again and her hand slid down his outer arm to his wrist. He remained silent, attempting to calculate her next move. Murdoc refused to believe that things couldn't go back to the way they were. Especially when he could see that she had her hands on him like that.

"Now earlier you said you wanted an 'agreement'," she said, emphasizing the last word. Murdoc gulped as he realized that her fingers were trailing from his arm to his shoulder and down to his chest now. She noticed this and softened her expression a bit, keeping the dangerous glint in her eyes.

"I think that maybe you were expecting to skip that conversation again if you could sneak your way back into my personal life, right?" she asked. Teresa had since placed her left arm around his neck. He realized that he was bringing his hand to rest on her waist involuntarily. She said nothing nor seemed to notice. Murdoc nodded his head, his mouth gaping a little. He knew it was her game now.

"So tell me Murdoc, what do YOU want?" Teresa finally asked, punctuating the question by tapping his nose with her right hand. Murdoc inched closer to her and wrapped both of his arms around her waist.

"You know what I want," Murdoc whispered to her, his eyes now lidded as his hands ran down her lower back to grab her rear. She had put her other arm around his neck in order to easily press her body against his.

"Well, of course I know what you want..." she replied, looking away from his lustful gaze, "But I need to hear you say it." She pecked him lightly on the cheek and pulled back a little, though he failed to loosen his grip on her.

"I just want to fuck you, love" he breathed as he buried his nose into her neck. He heard Teresa smirk a little, he knew she wasn't going to let him off easy.

"And that's fine Murdoc, you know I never was one to deny you that..."

Murdoc felt Teresa stroking his hair as he worked his way from her neck to her face. She seemed to abruptly stop, apparently realizing what she was doing and pushed him off of her slowly.

"What else do you want me to say?" Murdoc asked with a sigh as he rolled his eyes. He wasn't sure how much longer he could hold himself back.

"I'm not trying to be your girlfriend Murdoc, but I want this to be clear for the both of us from now on... if we are going to fuck around with each other you need to either decide whether you want to sleep around knowing that I'm going to do the same or if we are going to be actually dating."

Murdoc said nothing and continued groping at Teresa, eager to get her back to his Winnebago. He was sure he could get her to forget about it if he hit the right switch.

"So which is it?" Teresa asked, noticing Murdoc's distraction. She took this opportunity to pull away once again and measure his reaction.

Murdoc found himself at a crossroads. On the one hand he knew the type of person he was and how difficult it could be to control himself when it came to his sexual impulses. On the other hand, he felt oddly possessive of Teresa and couldn't stomach the thought of her with another man. It had been, as he recalled, the reason he confronted Teresa in the first place. Though he would never admit this to her.

He hesitated for a minute before he finally gave his answer.

"Let's come to an agreement, love," Murdoc murmured after a tense moment of silence passed between them.


End file.
